How To Stop Comparing Your Success To Others

One thing that most of us are guilty of doing is this: comparing ourselves to others.

We view life as a race and we are all pushing forwards to reach the finish line. We want to finish first, no matter how many people we push and trip over along the way. But here’s the thing. Life really isn’t a race. If it were, most of us would be at the back crawling along on our hands and knees, gasping for breath.

Life is hard. And it’s made even more difficult when we compare ourselves to other people. No good comes out of that. So, how can we learn to stop? It won’t be easy, but practising these 3 things should help you. 

Celebrate the small victories

What might be a small victory for some, could be a huge victory for others. A good way of prioritising yourself and practising self-care is to say, ‘well done,’ to yourself whenever you achieve something. Do this every day. Maybe you got out of bed on a day when your anxiety was at its highest. Maybe you went for a short walk to get some fresh air. Maybe you answered a few emails. These are all good things that you should be rewarding yourself for. 

Fight the feeling of jealousy

I’ll be the first to hold my hand up and say that I’ve experienced strong jealousy and envy towards other people who I believe have achieved far more in their lives. Jealousy can be intense and it’s one of the worst emotions you can feel because it makes you belittle yourself and those around you. Why do we experience a strong desire to do what everyone else is doing? Why can’t we just be happy with what we have right now? In those moments, it's important to remember where you are in your life at the present time. Try to be thankful for what you do have, instead of concentrating on what you don’t have. This can be hard to do, but it’s the only way to fight those feelings of jealousy and anger. Instead of saying, ‘they have a better job than I do,’ try to rephrase it in a way so you aren’t self-deprecating. Say, ‘they have a great job; If I keep working hard then one day I’ll be in a job that makes me a lot happier, too.’ 

Stop focusing so much on money

Money is often used as a way of measuring success. People often say, ‘if I were earning X amount of money then I would be happy,’ but the truth is that money doesn’t equate to happiness. You could be earning triple your salary right now and still not feel satisfied. In fact, it’s very likely that you wouldn’t be happy in that scenario because you would still feel the need to compare. Once you stop measuring your success by how much is in your bank account, you’ll probably find that you’ll be a lot more satisfied with your life overall.

Written by,

Coralle Skye